[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
cardboard imitation of a blue double-breasted suit, complete with a white
triangle of handkerchief sucking out of the pocket.
I was overcome at this point by terror so fierce and physical that it seemed
more biological than psychological. My blood and bones and muscles were much
more afraid than my mind. My skin began tingling, my hair felt like it was
getting a static charge. he sense of their presence in the room was so
unimaginably powerful, and so strange
. I tried to wake up
Anne but my mouth wouldn't open. The moment I thought of the kids a clear
picture flashed in my head of the two of them sleeping peacefully.
The thing before me seemed like a sort of interrogatory. Why the suit? Did it
mean that they were showing me a male? If this was a hive species, there might
well be more than one sex, and they might be physically very different.
Females, males, and stocky little drones?
Now what was I going to do, having called them lie here and quake? I had
Page 87
ABC Amber Palm Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abcpalm.html
wanted to communicate.
They were obviously waiting for me to do something. I saw their faces so
clearly, their eyes dark, glittering pits in their dun skin. I could not help
noticing that there was a sort of jollity about these beings. I'd thought
before that they seemed happy. Perhaps whatever they were trying to do was
going well.
They had responded to my summons. What on earth should I say? I wanted them to
know that I was still in possession of myself, that despite what I can only
describe as a terrific assault against me, physically and mentally, I was
still functional and on some level independent. More than this, I wanted them
to know how I felt about them, despite all the complex connotations of what
they were now doing to me. There may very well be good reasons for their
behavior. Have all of their contacts with human beings been peaceful? And how
about me: Had I fought in the past?
If they had a hive mind, it might be that the amount of volition I had left
was all they could allow me without risking loss of control of the situation.
What if I'd been able to do something unexpected very quickly, like reach out
and take one of them by the shoulders?
Would the hive then have become confused about where this being was? Would it
have been that simple to take a captive?
There was and is no way that I would ever make a provocative gesture in heir
presence. In fact, I wouldn't move at all unless bidden, not until I
understand more. If one could escape into their world, one could also get lost
in it.
Lying in that bed, I felt a very strong sense of responsibility. I had to
communicate in some nonthreatening manner. I was an emissary of sorts
although perhaps only to the court of nightmare. If so it was a strange sort
of bad dream, in that the terror began to pass even though the dream hadn't
ended.
Again it took an absolute concentration of will, a centering of my attention
and the application of the most careful effort to the muscles of my face, but
I did manage to smile.
Instantly everything changed. They dashed away with a whoosh and I was plunged
almost at once back into sleep. Now I did dream qualitatively a very
different experience from what had just transpired. Frankly, I'm quite certain
that the beings I saw were not a dream, and probably not a hallucination. What
they were was an enigma.
Interestingly, my dream was an unfrightening repeat of one of the few really
terrifying nightmares I have ever had. This was of being chased through a
stark stone palace by a robot with beady pop eyes. This time, however, I
didn't run and the robot finally sat down and contented itself with staring at
me.
The next thing I knew, morning came. I opened my eves, feeling absolutely
drained.
Anne said, "Well, it was a quiet night," and proceeded to make a beautiful
breakfast while I
sat and stared.
Everybody was happy and well around the breakfast table. The
Times was as thick as ever and the coffee and waffles were delicious. I was
back in my world again, with my own familiar family. When I told Anne about
[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]